It's okay, 'Hos - you can call off the trufflehounds and the search commission! I'm alive and swell (Well - swollen, really - YOU try spending two weeks straight in calf shackles and see if your skin doesn't feel a skoch chafey for a while. And leave it to Rovey to forget to buy the Gold Bond! I swear he'd forget his own underwear if he didn't have me spray mount them to him every day before work.), and promise to be a more reliable RoveHoPoster - now that I've learned just what can happen if my attention wavers.
See, I've been a bit tied up lately. And by tied up, I don't mean busy - though there certainly has been a fair amount of activity on my part. No, by "tied up", I mean "lashed with my own hair to the Barcalounger D'Amour with my face scant inches from a monitor showing tantalizing home movies from Rovey's pubescent years, pudding dish just out of fingertip reach, and a chastity aid padlocked firmly about my dainty regions". And while I know that sounds a lot like one of our usual "funishments", I assure you, it was MUCH more on the torture than the tease side of things because 1. when Rovey *would* allow me the occasional loving spoonful, it was whipped up with plain ol' skim milk, rather than from Rovey's own special dairy farm "Dangly Dell" and 2. Rovey made a point of scarfing down a whole bunch of cheese and other carefully selected snacks for the duration, rather than the patented prune curry coffee bars that assure quick 'n easy access to the padlock's key.
And why was I being censured and ceintured so? Sigh…
Remember a couple of weeks back when I made a passing comment about the scrumptiolicious blubbleumptiousness of Pennsylvania Congressional candidate Scott Paterno? Well of COURSE his main appeal to me is was that he's possessed of a certain greedy gusto and manly, ample abdomen reminiscent of my Cuddlekins, and I mentioned it on this here website just in case any RoveHos wanted to expand their worship of deliciously portly pols ('cause golly knows - there's rather a shortage of 'em!). Not 'cause I was seeking to supplement my daily intake of Pudding Pops, but just more to keep the 'HoMunity at large informed of some supplemental landing pads for their lust should they be frustrated with lack of access to my Plorplenumpkins (As much as my Mummy taught me to share, there are still only so many ladles of Sloppy Rove I'm willing to dole out!). Well, I guess I still had the potential PaternHos on my noggin' when I was in the middle of my kitchen tasks that day 'cause when Rovey came toddling down for his usual post-Suze Orman nosh late that night, he opened the Crisco tub to find that I'd been unconsciously tracing little hearts and line drawings of Mr. Paterno in the creamy surface. And that's NOTHING compared to what I did with the liverwurst. Well, after my Pulchritudinous Possum choked back his sorrows with a couple dozen packets of Newtons and a sixer of Double Fudge Yoo-hoo run through the blender, he rifled through his NIMH-issued Crisis Smoother Bag, and must have administered quite a Dozy Dose through my sleep-drooly lips 'cause I woke a couple of days later with Naugahyde burns on my sitting parts and Rovey telling me that once my cerebellum was entirely PaterNO, we could snuggle on the davenport and catch up with the four brand new Dr. Phils that'd heaped up on the TiVo while I was napping. Such a sweetie to save 'em for me - especially seeing as I'd been such a wayward 'Ho!
Aaaaanyhow, now that I've gotten the A-OK from the DARPA doc that my typing digits will make a full recovery, and that there was no *permanent* tissue damage up in cranium central, I promise I'll be much more on top of updates (not to mention dates up on top of Rovey!). Oh, and if anyone happened to TiVo the last week's worth of El Gordo y La Flaca and is willing to share, that'd be just luscious! I'd hate to get behind...
Hasta la RoveHo!
Are "THEY" through yet...we can't bear to look.
Closed doors...when will it "BE OVER"...
They have been practicing for weeks now, and should have their stories in sync...we're scared to come out...momma...help...
I can't remember, I don't recall saying that, It was not me Sir, I did not take those photographs of the atrocities towards the POW's Sir, No Sir, the camera has my name etched onto it, but of course it was not ME, SIR, I don't recall that Sir , no Sir, It must have gone off while I was walking by, Sir, Perhaps it slipped Sir, No, I do not recall my name Sir,um, I have no name Sir, I am not sure how I got here Sir, I thought this was Kosovo, and I am confused,SIR.
Posted by: zappedpinealgland at April 29, 2004 11:26 AMThey are still at it.
Posted by: Shhh at April 29, 2004 11:51 AMAre all of my ships back in port...? We are about ready to perform the Anvil Chorus, and I don't want any of that fine King - Fish to get stuck in the Bass-O-Matic...I've been holding off
the cleanup crew, but we gotta start now...so
I hope so.....
You better tell me if "Shades" is BACK, or I will stuff your slot, until you do! I Tried to tell him, but he seems to think it was all a big joke, and now, I can't sleep, worrying about Mr.Shades ...this is not nice...
Posted by: Worriedabout Shades at April 29, 2004 05:52 PMOkay, I will take that as a "YES" shades, so stay home for a while. Love, Peep.
Posted by: YOMOMMA at April 30, 2004 06:43 AMRoveHo's what are you saying?
Posted by: Peter at April 30, 2004 10:39 AMWould everybody stay off the phone, I am trying to read a book, and if you call me every 5 minutes it will not "change" anything, so,LET ME HAVE ONE FREAKING DAY OFF PLEASE>>>YES< THIS MEANS YOU!!!NO, just because I am always nice to you all does not mean that I am not referring to YOU! Call one of the other "GUYS" or put on CNN, I am in the throes of "something" and I need my...SPACE...(thankyou,I love you all)
Posted by: rovesrose at April 30, 2004 11:04 AMActions speak louder than words, and the actions suck, and were meant to screw you up.Remember that.Those people are sick.
Posted by: Mark2 at April 30, 2004 09:35 PMFull
Posted by: shunter at May 1, 2004 09:35 AMHail thee fair Lotus!
Thy wisdom exceeds thy company.
If the Goddess were to Rule the earth, there would be Peace and Harmony among "MEN".
Have your cake and eat it too.
I have spoken in haste, and in error. Shades is a noble and true man, one who is altruistic, and who should sit at the round table. One whom I would be proud to call my friend. Not all men are lost, nor self-seeking. He put himself before his friend, and that is most noble indeed.
Posted by: Medea at May 1, 2004 09:19 PMAnybody know where she is? She posted last night,so she is still alive. Call me.
Posted by: GBF at May 2, 2004 10:40 AMLets face it, we all screwed her to save our own asses.this is it, and she quit. How much could she take anyway?
Posted by: Snoop at May 3, 2004 10:55 AMone of you fucking brain surgeons has to call Michele and Dario,and it aint going to be me.
Posted by: M at May 3, 2004 12:20 PMJB did.
Posted by: Shunter at May 3, 2004 04:41 PMEverybody had better back off. No calls, no e,
no visits. I was just over there, Kerry is punching the wall, and Shunter just broke up with his girlfriend,so they want some blood.
GB,don't beep,or they will kick your ass.
There was only ONE way they could get me back to work. Co-incidence?
Posted by: back4jerry at May 7, 2004 06:45 AMEverybody call in - back to work. Lets keep the meatballs to a minimum, as you can see, there is enough parmesan on my pasta to last a lifetime.
Virginia, change the diaper on this stinky baby,
and everybody, pull out your strap-on-cojones,
Its time to go bag Bin.
I am never going outside again.
Posted by: Redhead at May 8, 2004 01:35 PMI am too naive'.
I suppose that you all tried to tell me, knowing the true nature of the "BEAST".
I am roasting on a spit, and somehow I know that all of you were right, there is no justice in America, and no Law. The Laws are created to suit the opportunity. I see the innocent being sent to suffer, while the guilty hide behind the powers that be. I was wrong, and my heart is breaking. I wish that I could be "finished" and hide in a corner. The next time that I go "out".It has to be as myself, so set your watches, there is going to be some age progression. Then, I am finished. If "YOU" want to write the screen-play, go ahead. I'll meet you in 10 years. I just want to be alone.
My butt is sort of tender, from all of the paddling. I would not be much good right now.
I have just realized that due to a lack of sleep,
I am now suffering from total, and complete
AMNESIA.
It is a wonderful state of being, and is almost
ZEN, since it forces you to live in the present moment.
It also solves all of my problems, and I now realize why everyone around me suffers from it as well.
I would have thought of it sooner, but, I forgot to think of it, since I have amnesia.
It comes in every color, and fits everyone, so I am sure that it will fit you just fine.
I am going to design a new color blend, and call it "AMNESIA" and paint a wainbow with it, and paint the entire world the color of AMNESIA.
I am going to start a foundation, called
AMNESIA INTERNATIONAL, and everyone can join.
I don't know anyone, since I have amnesia, nor do I remember anything. If you are reading this, it means that YOU HAVE AMNESIA AS WELL,
since it is very contagious.
Before I get some shut eye, I would like to remind my special "friends" to not mistake kindness for stupidity. We are all around you. The next time you think you have a "clever" idea, just stop, and say, "NO". That is how everyone will get through this, by doing "NOTHING", having "NO IDEAS". I have seen strange things in my time, so this is no big deal. Relax, do nothing. I repeat, NOTHING. There, now isn't this easy? It works for ME!
Posted by: Noggin at May 11, 2004 10:42 PMI would like to say hello to everyone. I enjoy painting, and politics. I thought it would be a good idea for me to post here. Miky says hello to all of his special friends. Leave the painting of wainbows to me, since I can paint any scene, and make a masterpiece.*wink* - *wink*
Posted by: Iv at May 12, 2004 10:13 AMRight about now, the Artichoke comments are starting to sink in. Braised ARTichokes are best cooked in a Dutch oven.
We are all out of town. Don't come by to check.
Give her time to un-ravel this ball of string.
It has a few kinks in it, so it will take time.
Funny, how she always anticipates when, and where the action will take place. Lucky for you.
Now you know why she is so valuable, to everybody.
Especially Bush, especially now.
I am not away. Miky is just upset, and since no one would ever mistake him for being Kind, or Stupid, he was speaking for ME. He is PHAT, however. I am working on it. It will be okay, for everybody. WHEW...since, It was after all, a training exercise, with paperwork to prove it.
Now, go have some GOUDA CHEESE, from HOLLAND, and stay away from the ARTICHOKES.
We are DONE...The head count on that GOUDA is amazing, and "WHAT" is in OHIO? Maybe its'
HI, HO...? Who knows. I have Amnesia, since I wanted to "FIX" this, before I got a good sleep, and regained my memory. BE GOOD, not GOUDA.
I just gave "THE GUARD" a Heineken...
I thought he deserved it....SHEESH.
I think we are OKAY here, so let's keep it that way....You guys are LUCKY THAT I LOVE YOU ALL!!!
Dear FISH who got caught in my net, do you have any idea how lucky you are??? I am still reeling (no pun intended) ARGGH!!!!!
KOLOMAN...yes...YOU...I will see you soon.
EVERYBODY ELSE< HAVE SOME AMNESIA MARTINIS!!!!!
Be nice...thanks to the GOUDA BRAIN...I DO have a list of everybody, and I do mean everybody...and so do about 23 other "helpful"
folks...so no dirty tricks!
How come the news is frozen ? Is Rove the iceman?
You know that the ice man cometh.
You should all read "GOD, COUNTRY AND TORTURE"
available at Amazon...W.B. is an amazing author,
and has some useful information for all who read this thread! He does not mind if I advertise his books here, since he likes to visit.*wink*wink*
He has a wonderful sense of humor, as well.
He is also good at restoring public faith, maybe not in Government, but certainly other things.
You should all buy his books, since he let me post his Book and Initials here, as a personal favor to me. He is my BLUMBLUM, and I love him!!!
I tawt I taw a puddy tat...
Posted by: Tweety at May 25, 2004 08:23 PMSomething worth seeing, for all you RoveHO's,
"SUPER SIZE ME", a sweet documentary. Also, the DOONESBURY comic strip for today, MAY 30,2004.
Did you all miss me...? I just flew in, and BOY, are my wings TIRED.
I'm sick. I think that I have plane flu.
I am going to sleep, and I sure wish that I had the hours back that I have spent on needless worry, don't you? Gosh darnit,I have a LOT to do.
So many Turkeys, so little time.sigh....
"..The road is long, with many a winding turn, that leads us to who knows where..." He ain't heavy...he's my meatball..."
Posted by: Weekend@JEBS at June 1, 2004 05:33 PMIs everybody finished screwing me? Can I go wipe off now?
Posted by: soretang at June 5, 2004 01:14 PMWWW.E-CREDIT-CARD-DEBT.COM
Posted by: click here at June 5, 2004 01:25 PMMichael, I think I love you!
Posted by: inlove at June 5, 2004 01:50 PMVenus in Transit today.
Posted by: Starhustler at June 6, 2004 01:45 PMVenus in transit today.
Posted by: Starhustler at June 7, 2004 10:08 AMHustler,she won't talk. Leave her alone.
Posted by: shewontalk at June 7, 2004 11:12 AMYou are like a bunch of little paranoid babies.
I am going to take a nap.
Hustler, you had better go buy me a tin of Chuppa-Chups....Venus in Transit is pissed off.
I know "Which" baby you are, so don't forget,
I want my Chuppa-Chups, and not the tiny economy
tin, but the SUPER DUPER GRANDE tin.
F911
Posted by: Michael at June 8, 2004 06:56 PMWow,this site is weird I've no idea what it's about I just found it while searching google with some of the lyrics of the song Gone with the Sin by Him (His Infernal Majesty) 'I love your skin oh so white'. By the way the song is amazing! Download it and the following other songs by him as a start!!
Join me (in death)
The funeral of hearts
Razorblade kiss
Right here in my arms
love you all don't know who this karl rove is that youare babbling on about n e ways seeya i've got some revision to do for my computing As
Visit My Website, MICHAELMOORE.COM
I will send you all free movie passes.
I will personally answer all mail.
Michael, I think I love you!
Posted by: MissYou at June 21, 2004 04:29 PMI am neither a DEMOCRAT nor a Republican.
Play fair!!!
Posted by: Whatballsuhave! at June 28, 2004 05:10 PMThe proof is in the pudding.
Posted by: Pudding at June 29, 2004 10:26 AMJust a test
Posted by: Lolita at July 6, 2004 09:22 AMDear ALEX...I have been thinking about you for SOME TIME NOW...you seem a bit...angry...and sort of mean,hostile,and unsure of what to do with your FREE $ TIME...well, posting here, with those sort of threatening song titles, makes me want to get to the bottom of things, and give you a good spanking...
Posted by: COOCHIECOOBA at July 6, 2004 12:32 PMI hate lawyers too. Ignorance is bliss.
Posted by: legallyblonde at July 25, 2004 03:06 PM