Aside from the obvious, there sure are some special perks that go with being elected First RoveHo. Take today - Rovey is such a naughty little nabob that when we woke up to twelve cold, wet inches (well, I'm used to waking up to something that size, but it's pretty throbbing hot!) of snow, Rovey decided that not much governmenting was gonna get done on the East coast, so he gave a quick jingle to Andrews, and within the hour, we were renewing our membership in the Mile High Club up somewhere over the Pittsburgh metro area.
Now I know the Rough Rider bedroom is technically in the East Wing, but methinks it's not unlikely that after this last jaunt, the main bedchamber on Air Force One will pick up the moniker "Karl's Kinky Cabin". Mmmmrrroooow! You'll never hear me bellyache about turbulence again!
See, when you travel as Rovey's vouched-for guest, you don't have to fret about any pesky security checks before boarding, so once we're sky high, he orders me to thoroughly inspect HIS package for any massive weapons of destruction. Ooohhh, I assure you I am VERY thorough in my investigation - going over and over every inch (and there are a lot of them) meticulously to see if anything is set to explode. Oh sometimes it takes quite a while, but something always ends up going off - especially if I have to perform a special gloved-finger search. Rovey's such a cunning l'il smuggler.
As it turned out, I was so wrapped up in keeping my baby in his full upright & locked position, that I was utterly gobsmacked to feel the wheels touch the tarmac. The whole way, I tried to cajole Rovey to give me a hint as to our destination, but he was such a stubborn imp that he even had his aides sneak in and pack the costumes he wanted me to wear. Well, once I scrambled over to the window and yanked up the shade to reveal a big ol' Sphinx staring me in the face, I knew for sure there was gonna be a steamy round of "keno runner and pit boss" in Sin City tonight.
Anyhow, we've just checked into Rovey's (or, as he likes to sign into the guest register, "Lenny Larouche") specially equipped private suite here at the Luxor, and he's on the phone with room service, ordering up some Kaluha, onion dip, mixed nuts and an "intimacy kit" so we can have some giggle time before tonight's reservation at Excalibur Casino's Tournament of Kings. It's a dinner show with the slogan "Lances and Swords, but no forks and knives." Thing is, it doesn't sound all that different from a dinner and "jousting match" right here in the room with Rovey!
Ooops - he's off the phone and strolling on over with his hip flask of canola oil. Until later - Viva Rove Vegas, fellow RoveHos!